Gwyneth Paltrow holding a condom and a cucumber. That's probably somebody's fantasy.
So, for some reason, New Directions is fixated on boning this week. Unfortunately, all this accomplishes is bringing to light how naive the club is when it comes to the intricacies of sex. Lucky for them, that devilishly seductive substitute, Holly Holiday, is back, and willing to get down to the nitty gritty with the kids. This is the catalyst for some serious shit to go down.
First off, the throwaway line in the Sectionals episode last season that alluded to Brittany and Santana engaging in... uhh... sapphic pleasures has developed into a full on subplot, and a heavy one at that. They turn to Holly to help them figure out whatever it is that have, which leads to Santana making a pretty shocking discovery about herself.
Meanwhile, Kurt and Blaine, having been informed by Sue that New Directions are sexing up for Regionals, decide to bring up their appeal as well. Unfortunately, Kurt knows next to nothing about sex, and Blaine is legitimately worried. The kid is a junior in high school and he's hopelessly ignorant. Blaine appeals to Burt to have 'the talk", something that neither of the Hummels is very keen on doing.
Finally, the reappearance of Holly into his life has made Will do some thinking. He realizes that he's incredibly attracted to her, and wants to be with her. Unfortunately, Holly is, as she puts it, "damaged goods", and is not keen on engaging in anything serious. While this is going on, Emma is finally forced to address her sham of marriage to Carl. Oh, and Quinn gets back with Finn.
Yeah. Pretty heavy stuff on the relationship front in this episode. I wish to applaud the writers for their skilled work on the Brittany/Santana dynamic. Here was something that could have easily gone down the "exploitation for the purposes of comedy" path, but it didn't. Instead it went down the, "Yes, we're ok with dealing with lesbians! Deal with it!" path. The fact that Santana may be a lesbian is a very good idea for the character, and certainly something that we did not expect to be seeing from her when she auditioned for the club in the second episode of the series. It was very well told, and Naya Rivera did some of her best acting of the whole series in the scene where she confesses her love to Brittany. It's the first time where I've actually felt sympathetic for Santana, and the moment was more than welcome. I can't wait to see where this goes.
Music wise, the episode was a step up from "Blame it on the Alcohol", but still not great. Holly's down and dirty rendition of Gary Glitter's "Don't You Want To Touch Me" took it a bit far, but was still a good time. The Warbler's song, Neon Trees' "Animal" was alright, but what the hell was that bubble cannon for? Brittany, Santana, and Holly's soulful take on The Dixie Chick's "Landslide" was adequate, elevated by some baller acting by Rivera and Heather Morris. Emma's horrendous take on "Afternoon Delight" made me want to rupture my ear drums. Finally, Will and Holly's cover of Prince's "Kiss" was awful at the start, but got better. Also, that scene was friggin' hot, so a little creepy falsetto is something I can look past.
Humor wise, Glee, once again, offered plenty of juicy material. Of course Brittany would think that the stork who built a nest on her roof is a sign that she's pregnant. Of course Lauren and Puck would be looking into making a sex tape. Of course Finn would mistake Holly's demonstration of proper condom use to mean that a cucumber can give you aids. Ay-Yi-Yi! Good stuff.
Well, it all comes down to this. Regionals are next week. Can't wait to see what Rachel comes up with. I am really hoping that the writers don't let the Santana/Brittany plot be forgotten; it's too good for that. Looks like Paltrow might become a semi-regular now that she and Will are together. Ok then. Would be fine, if Emma didn't just effectively end her relationship with Carl. Jesus, why can't these people go drama free for one week. AGHGHGHGH!!!
So, Holly made a sex tape with JD Salinger. I think my mind just exploded!