According to the Movies #2

When in doubt, always go for the bazooka. Like Xander says, "Think Playstation!"

If he says it, it must be true!

BTW: This isn't going to become a daily thing. I'm just testing the waters. I'm thinking a weekly thing. What say you?

According to the Movies #1

Never, ever, dump Jason back in the lake after you have dealt with him! That ominous body of water has regenerative properties that only apply to him!

Seriously!

Inception Fever: Trailers

We're really coming down to the wire here, aren't we? As July 16th inches ever closer, the crazy levels of anticipation begin to reach monumental levels. I honestly have not been this excited for a movie since, well, since The Dark Knight. It's Chris Nolan, man! The guy knows where my weak spot is, and continually jabs at it with his sword of righteous awesomeness. Anyway, where was I? Oh, right! As I have said before, as July 16th looms around the corner, I will continue to review and analyze all the juicy little things that have made up the marketing. I've already gone over posters, so, now's the time to go over the trailers. Take a seat. Open your mind.

Happening For A Reason

The "Almost Dead Zone", on the verge of destruction with Toy Story 3, has now become of perpetual way of life this summer. Seriously, Inception is going to have be like, the best thing since, oh I don't know, the invention of the cell phone if it wants to have a chance of setting the season back on track. The latest film to attempt to fill the void, and fail, is Knight and Day. I had a lot of hopes for this movie. It looked like a smart, witty, satirization of kick-ass spy movies, from Bond to Bourne. It was directed by a promising talent, and starred a lead that has been enjoying a steady, upward climb back into the spotlight. Don't get me wrong, Knight and Day a whole hell of a lot better then some other recent action movies. It's a good time. But, I had such grand expectations for this one, that I came out feeling slightly disappointed.

Oh look! It's Ethan Hunt's long lost clone!

Classically Trained

Ok, that's it! I'm actually starting to get worried here! I mean, seriously! How do they do it? Sure, they are talented filmmakers, but, even the best in the biz has a misfire every now and then. So, what the hell Pixar? What is your secret? How do all your films (except Cars) manage to be so good. You have even managed to leap over the usual obstacles that usually plague kids films, especially kids films that also happen to be sequels. Toy Story 3 not only manages to live up to the legacy set by its two older brothers, but also manages to close out the only consistently excellent film trilogy in history on a ridiculously high note! I will explain that brash claim in a bit. Toy Story 3 is sweet, funny, and entertaining, but, as has become tradition with Pixar, more mature then most, if not all, movies out there.

The toys are back in town!

How the West Was Lost!!

I have neither the energy nor the interest to write a full review of Jonah Hex, so, this'll be quick. Jonah Hex is not worth any of the hard earned cash that you will spend on it. I went in expecting a bad, but kick-ass action film. What I got was a really bad, boring as hell action film. The acting is terrible; Michael Fassbender is the only one having any fun in his role! The action is boring and uninspired. All the "DAMN" moments that these movies should have are nowhere to be seen! Bad special effects, really generic plotting, and the most anti-climatic finale in recent memory add up to make this one contemptible piece of work. If you are looking for fun, pointless action, The A-Team will suit far better than Jonah Hex. This is movie made in the wrong time. It belongs back in the 90s, when comic book movies sucked, rather then now, when they are awesome! It would have been right at home then.

Look At This!!

Here's the latest episode of the LAMBcast that I contributed to. In it, Dylan of Blog Cabins, Marshall of Marshall and the Movies, Nick of Random Ramblings of a Demented Doorknob, and myself talk about Get Him to the Greek, what makes a good comedy, and two trailers that have been circulating the web. You can't really hear me at some points. I wasn't able to use my external mic, seeing as the computer is new and doesn't have a mic jack, for some reason! That will be remedied by the time I contribute again, which I plan to do. Enjoy!

LAMBcast #26
The LAMBcast

POST #100: Just Barely Coming Together!!

Man, talk about a dry spell! There have not been any BIG movies to write home about since Iron Man 2. I'm actually getting worried here. Summer is supposed to be the most exciting time at the theaters, but this year would suggest otherwise. Sure, there have been plenty of blockbusters coming out, but none of them have that special something that makes a film BIG. The A-Team is the latest in a long line of contenders to attempt to fix this problem. It's not up to the task, but it is a perfectly average time at the movies. The latest in a dynasty of television shows being made into movies, The A-Team maintains all the campiness of the show, but shoots itself in the foot by a dumb plot and loose acting, not to mention some shoddy CG. It's enjoyable, but forgettable. 

Boom!

The New System

So, let's be frank! Letter grades are nice, but so cliche, wouldn't you say? They've served me well for a good while now, but, the time as come to retire them. So, without further ado, I present to you the new rating system for DC. Taking a cue from Fletch over at Blog Cabins, there are five ratings that a film can earn.

1.

The best of what's around! This is a movie that you should actively seek out. See it, and you will be as happy as JGL is in this photo!

2.

Not a masterpiece, but still worth your time. A perfectly fine and satisfactory movie. It's like Rob's and Laura's relationship, peppered with problems, but they still love it!

3.

A resounding eh. It might still be enjoyable, but the cracks in the seams are clearly visible. It's a movie that you might enjoy whilst in it, but you'll forget it pretty quickly.

4.

Here's where things start to get ugly. While not completely terrible, it is most definitely not worth spending money on. Sonny has a fierce temper, but he chooses his targets well.

5.

An absolute contemptible piece of work. Avoid it like it's the Rage Virus, lest you become like these fine gents here! Think of your well being, damn it!

Make sense? Good. Hope you all approve of the change. See you next time.

Inception Fever: Posters and Banners

Is it July 16 yet? No? RAGE! We still have a good month before Inception, the sure to be masterpiece from Chris "Batman Legitimizer" Nolan, hits the market. As I said previously, I would be closely stalking following the progress of the marketing/advertising as we inch closer to its release. Four new banners were just released to the public, so I though now would as good a time as any to take a look at all the posters that have been a part of this weird journey. Take a seat. Let's look at some pictures!

Rub The Furry Wall

YES!!! We finally have a comedy worthy of standing in the halls of hysterical gold for 2010. After a slew of allegedly funny rom-coms, indecisive action-comedies, and stupid sex-comedies, we have Get Him to the Greek. If you may remember, a few weeks ago, I filed this one under the category of The Ones to Watch (With Reservations). I should have listened to Aiden from Cut The Crap, and gotten rid of the "(With Reservations)" part for this one, because, if there is a funnier movie this year, I will be seriously surprised! This is quite simply one of the funniest movies I've seen in a good while, one that single handedly rescues the Judd Apatow factory from the sinkhole it was falling into. Get Him to the Greek is crude, vulgar, disgusting, offensive, and immature as all holy hell! But since when is that a bad thing?

His stage presence is off the charts!