I'm pressed for time. It's late, and I got friends to see, podcasts to record, and packing to do tomorrow, so, this'll be brief.
Simon, I'm gonna be taking after your own style again. I hope you don't mind. For the record, you got my vote!
Anyway...
- Lack of Gore Verbinski really hurts this thing.
- Jack Sparrow can't carry a whole movie. He worked best as sort of a supporting character whose purpose was to liven up the main plot. Come to think of it, that's why the first Pirates movie is the only one that worked, since it's the only one that followed that trope.
- Never thought I'd say this, but I'd take Legolas and the chick from Atonement over the half baked missionary/mermaid romance that we have here.
- Director Rob Marshall should stick to elaborate, if unimpressive, musicals.
- That mermaid scene where the devilish sea bitches come and run train on the humans was awesome!
- Ian McShane makes for an effective villain. He says he's a bad man, and we believe him.
- Penelope Cruz serves no purpose other than to look hot... so you'll hear no complaint from me. :-p
- Jack Sparrow is still a boss, but he's running out of tricks. The judge thing was clever, but that's about it.
- This franchise has almost become a parody of itself. Are we done Disney? Do you think you've milked enough out it?
- Of course not. Why else would you so unapologetically set up for a sequel?
- 3D was nothing special, except during the mermaid sequence.
- Overheard a conversation walking out the theatre that I think summed it up pretty nicely. "This may just be me, but I didn't get that movie." Well said, good sir!
Oh, I mind, guy. First you wipe my CC score (of whose ass I was kicking), now this? Do you hate me, dear Sebastian? Have I angered you? Do I need to bleed a lamb to earn your forgiveness? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!?
ReplyDeleteOK, for the record, ya weren't winning! Castor was winning! You just tied. Secondly, I do this as a form of flattery! Be flattered! You don't need to bleed a lamb. I don't even think that's possible, and I'm not about to force people into things if they can't deliver! No, you have not angered me! Stop reading into things!
ReplyDeleteI was so totally winning, bro. You're just in denial.
ReplyDeleteI have lambs at my disposal. I'm all set for any pagan rituals I might need come finals.