April 30, 2012

Trailer Trash: Prometheus

It's time to root through some trailers. What sorts of wonderful things will be alluded to today?

So this new one offers up plenty of sexy new info, providing new insight on what Charlize Theron's character is all about. It seems she's the resident Weyland-Yutani company prick who clearly knows more than she's telling. And then there are even more cryptic shots of what ever it is that is terrorizing the crew. What's that weird snake thing? And HOLY BALLS A DUDE'S FACE MELTS!!!

But, come on. What else do I have to say?

It's the new Prometheus trailer...

... and it will make you shit your pants!

April 26, 2012

This Is Important: First Django Unchained Photos

STOP!!!

THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHATEVER IT IS YOU WERE JUST DOING!!!

THE MODERN WARFARE CAN WAIT!!! THIS IS BETTER!!!

So, as new begins to trickle in about Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained, a tale of revenge, blood, violence, and sheer swag set against abolitionist era America, the advertisement branch of the project has been fired up.

A few weeks ago, we got a cryptic yet sweet poster. And now we have...

THIS...


... AND THIS!!!!


OH MY GOD!!! SEX!!! PURE SEX!!!

But no, seriously. Aren't those awesome? Waltz and Foxx look all kinds of five different types of badass, and if Leo is not nearly as ridiculous and evil as this photo makes him out to be, than there is no God!!!

Thoughts?

April 16, 2012

Horror By Design

Before you proceed, a word of warning. You've probably seen said warnings on other reviews, but I cannot overstate this enough. If you have not seen The Cabin in the Woods yet, do not, I repeat, DO NOT, click that "Take a Leap" button. There will be spoilers aplenty, and believe me when I say, you do not want to be privy to any spoilers when you go into this movie. All you need to know is this. The Cabin in the Woods is sort of being advertised as your standard slasher flick where a bunch of teens do stupid things and get butchered, but hear me when I say that it is not! Cabin in the Woods is a smart, funny, scary, devilishly clever take on the horror genre that breathes new life into what was fast becoming one of the most predictable style of movies around. Boasting genuine scares and thrills, an instantly quotable script, and a premise too ingenious for words, Cabin in the Woods is one you cannot afford to miss. And that's it. If you haven't seen it, stop right here. Leave! Vanish!

Are they gone? Good. Now, all you who have seen it, click that button and let's get into it.

This is the work of Loki!

April 13, 2012

Trailer Trash: Looper

It's time to root through some trailers. What sorts of wonderful things will be alluded to today?

Well, it's here.

The first trailer for Looper has arrived, and with it, our first look at what is sure to be one of my favorites of the year.

I could go on, on, and on about how the movie looks absolutely sexy, how the make up used to make JoGo a convincing younger version of Bruce Willis is sublime, how the fact that such a talented beauty as Emily Blunt is in this puts it even higher on the must watch list, how the action looks intimate and vicious, and how the concept burns with such blue fire intensity I can feel the sparks off it.

But, it would be fruitless, for someone else summed it all up for me, and did in less than ten words.


Well said brother!!!

April 4, 2012

Wrath and Cheese

No one was really expecting anything from Wrath of the Titans. I mean, no one was really expecting anything from Clash of the Titans, yet that one still managed to disappoint. Regardless, a boatful of money can be very persuasive, and a sequel has befallen us underserving mortals. Boasting much of the same "talent", but with the scale ramped way up, Wrath of the Titans sits poised to deliver exactly what I had hoped for from the first. A ridiculous, relentless, effects heavy action flick. The first one was one of the most boring films I can recall seeing that year. This one... not so much. Sure, Wrath of the Titans doesn't have anything resembling a decent plot or a single well developed character. But it is so generous with the gonzo violence that I find myself strangely impressed by it. Though that could just have to do with my lowered expectations. Hm...

Whatever. Let's get into it.

Take me back James Cameron!

April 3, 2012

Trailer Trash: Ted & Total Recall

It's time to root through some trailers. What sorts of wonderful things will be alluded to today?

First off, a summer blockbuster.

Ok, the idea of a remake to a film I honestly didn't think all that much of is never a good starting point in my book, but this trailer has me interested. Not only does it evoke images of Blade Runner and Minority Report, it just looks flat out awesome.

Will there be actual substance? Probably not, but I have my hopes. Colin Farrell looks much more convincing as a confused everyman who just happens to be a killing machine than Arnold Complicated-Last-Name could ever hope to be, and Len Wiseman has a decent track record when it comes to riculous action.

So, yeah, count me as cautiously optimistic.



This one, on the other hand, has me sold, hook, line, and sinker!

It's the trailer for Ted. 


Put simply, this just might be the funniest thing I've seen in a long time! I can't wait for this one!